What I was feeling when I heard that Jay died..

On the day that I heard that Jay was killed, I immediately felt like a small piece of me died. Although Jay and I just recently rekindled our relationship, he will forever be a part of me. When I heard the news, I felt as if my world was crumbling beneath me. I couldn't help but feel that my life would never really be the same. In the short couple days I had spent with him before he had died, I felt as if I was on cloud nine. With this news, I felt as though my life had no meaning. I felt as if I couldn't go on, but I couldn't show how badly this affected me because of Tom. All I wanted to was for Gatsby to be back, holding me tight and consoling me, but I knew I would never be able to have one of those moments again. What I felt that day, was probably one of the worst feelings I have ever had. Words cannot begin to describe what or how I was feeling. What really made my heart tremble was the fact that I would never be able to hold Jay or kiss him again. The last words I said to him were not even meaningful, and in fact, I do not even remember them. I hope that I will never, ever feel this way again, and I would not wish this feeling on anyone. Not even my biggest enemy.